Friday, May 09, 2003

Minutes like hours, hours like days ... Yea, it's one of those nights when time drags its tired heels across the celestial floor and I'm frozen inside. I've had a long and trying night on the job – lots of pages to headline and 'fit,' and lots of computer fritzes to tolerate. My teeth are on edge and I'm feeling both aggressive and defeated. Odd sensation, that.
So my roommate has a crew of dart-throwers coming over in few minutes and I'm waiting to find out whether I'll be see D tonight or no. She's playing her "I'm in my world and you don't have access" game – meaning she's visiting with someone she doesn't want me to A. Know about; B. See; or C. Encounter at her house; or, of course, D. None of the above. But it's such a dead giveaway when she says to me, "I don't think that's any of your business," if I ask if she has company. What's to hide? I don't know and I don't really care right this moment. But it's aggravating, especially since I forgot my jacket at her house and my smokes are in the pocket and here I sit without tobacco.
So now I'll give her a call and find out whether she's still in the 'game' mode or ready to simply be herself, ya know what I mean?
Oh ho! So now the story is, "I thought you were coming over."
"You told me I had to wait another 30 minutes to call first or don't you remember that?" I replied.
"Oh. Well, I must hvae, well, uh, come n over, please. I need some help."
Right. Help. That means she wants me to run to the store for her before bedtime. She must want some cereal or ice cream. And so it goes.
Why must some women be so fuggin' catty and fake when it suits them? Most shouldn't even try since the do it so badly anyway. Just be yourself, live your life and have a good time if you can. Life's too short to fuss about whatever you think your big sin may be. Mostly, nobody give a damn what you or I do during our brief plop on this spinning mudball. So go for it. Just do it! Score, whore or get some more of whatever makes you feel like you. Maybe I'll see you on the other side. Goodnight.

So now I'll give her a call

Wednesday, May 07, 2003

The changing world rolls onward Now that we've overcome the Iraqi regime of Saddam Hussein we've got a huge problem on our hands. The world – not just the Arab world – will judge this nation by its actions in Iraq in the next few months. Our displacing Saddam was, no doubt, a good thing, in so far as there is such a thing when politics is the motivating force. But I'm a bit worried about how well thought out the Bush doctrine was concerning the post-war rearrangement of governance in Iraq.
So far, it appears inept and heavy-handed. Let's face it, the first poor bastard we sent in to assume a governmental role was slaughtered by the people he was supposed to lead. Now what does that say about our tactical information? It's a bit thin perhaps?
Trying to impose democracy on a people who've never known a government led by democratic principles is going to be, I fear, a bloody affair and may, in the long run, blow up in our collective faces.
It seems to me that we're probably going to induct the same people who served under Saddam since they're the only ones who've got the experience of governing and that will be ironic, I think. The people of Iraq, mostly poor, uneducated and raised under tyranny since birth, probably have no clue as to what kind of government they want at this point. And to pull out our forces without having some sort of stable, governing body in place would be disastrous. Iraq could become Osama bin Laden's penthouse apartment, if you will, unless we somehow win the hearts of the Iraqis. A tall order, given that the euphoria of the first days of our advance and disbursement of Saddam's armies has worn off. Now the Iraqi people seem to want, more than anything, American troops to leave them to fight for power among themselves. But that definitely does not fit the Bush plan, far as I can tell.
So what now? Between Gen. Franks and this guy Garland I'm not sure there's a snowball's chance in hell of creating anything resembling democracy in Iraq. What will it take? Obviously recognized leaders from the Iraqi population, leaders who the people are willing to accept and leaders who want to conduct business with the U.S. in an open, amiable manner.
Where are those men and women? I've yet to see any such characters proffered by our government and this is worrisome, to say the least. And with Bush calling for a $750 billion tax cut for the rich, and the cost of rebuilding Iraq and sustaining our troops spiraling ever-higher, I find myself confused as to where the money will come from. Oh, excuse me. I forgot. Probably, per usual, the burden will be borne by the American middle-class. The two-worker families who struggle from paycheck to paycheck, barely able to keep health insurance for their children and meet the house mortgage. Ah well, the picture grows clearer as I type. It's on you, my friend. Be prepared to watch your paycheck whittled down to nearly nothing, but trust el presidente to come up with some snappy platitudes to make your grumbling, unfed stomach quiet down. Amen.

Monday, May 05, 2003

No Monday is a good Monday for me Yea, it's another Monday. But unlike most of the working class rabble like myself, Monday is one of my days off. And today has been pretty uneventful so far. And that's why I'm sitting here wondering how to spice up my evening a bit since I've had one of the most dull days I've experienced in a long time.
Of course, that's my fault and nobody's but mine. I just felt uninspired and lazy, frankly, and besides that, I'm flat broke – a real drag when one doesn't feel like reading a book, which, by the way, I usually find great enjoyment in doing. But not today.
No, today's been one of those Twilight Zone days when I just could not find anything to hold my attention long enough to immerse me in concentration or revelry. Some days are simply blah days, and this certainly has been one of them.
About the most productive thing I've done today is work on a Mother's Day card for D, my lady friend. For some reason when I printed a 'proof' copy the colors came out too green, so now I have to learn how to adjust my computer's linkup with my printer, something I didn't have to do at all when using OS 9.2. Oh well. So it goes. And rather than bore anyone out there with my own malaise. I'll simply say, sayonara and good luck one and all.

Sunday, May 04, 2003

Back to school I finally got OS 10.2 installed and working on my computer (iMac) and now it's back to computer school for me. There are so many different items, icons and settings to learn, from what I can see right now, I'll be a month just learning the basics.
But I do like the swirling graphics and the dock. Once I figure out how to use some of this stuff I'm sure it will make using my computer fun again. Well, to be perfectly honest, I HOPE it will make it fun. So far I've had to download updates for several programs just to make it function, and I had to download Windows Media for OS X and ditto for RealPlayer, but that went smoothly for the most part. It's mostly hit or miss at this point. Fortunately one of the technicians at work loaned me an OS X operating system manual (eck!) that should help me configure things properly. But as I said, it will be a slow, laborious process.
Why do we put ourselves through these labor-intensive exercises on computers just to make surfing the Internet or creating documents "easier?" I really haven't a clue. But that's my Sunday entry. I just realized I've spent most of the day fiddling with this thing. Time to get out and look at the stars.
Speaking of stars, where are the Democratic candidates who have a chance against Bush? If the debate last Thursday is any indication, the party is in real trouble. It seems that no one has a solid platform yet and I have my doubts about whether one is forthcoming.
I'll keep my fingers crossed.
Hello to Mike and Susan. Hope all is well. And hello to Justin, Irisa, Kathleen and D.
It's a hot, muggy night, especially in this room, so I'm out. Adios for now.